The "ACTUALLY" List: A Gentle Check-In for the Year So Far

By the time May rolls around, many of us are carrying a mix of things: plans we were excited about in January, surprises we didn’t see coming, and maybe a few goals that have shifted shape along the way.

That’s where the “Actually” List comes in.

It’s a simple reflection exercise designed to help you pause and take an honest look at how your year has actually been going so far - not how you hoped it would look, not how you think it should look, but what has truly been taking up your time, energy, and attention.

How it works

Set a timer for two or three minutes and complete the sentence:

“In Q1, I actually…”

Write it down ten times, filling in the blank each time with whatever comes to mind.

For example:

• In Q1, I actually spent more time resting than I expected.

• In Q1, I actually showed up for myself in ways I hadn’t noticed.

• In Q1, I actually poured a lot of energy into work.

• In Q1, I actually let some things go.

There’s no right or wrong way to do this. The goal isn’t to impress yourself or create the “perfect” reflection. It’s simply to notice what was real for you in the first part of the year.

Notice the patterns

Once your list is done, take a moment to read it back slowly.

What themes are showing up?

Maybe your energy has gone toward work, school, healing, relationships, creativity, or simply getting through the day. Maybe you’ve been resting more than producing. Maybe you’ve been surviving, and that matters too.

This part isn’t about judgment. It’s about curiosity. Sometimes our actual priorities look different from the ones we set at the beginning of the year. That doesn’t mean we’ve failed. It just means life has been teaching us something worth paying attention to.

A moment to replant your goals

This point in the year can be a helpful time to reset.

If your January goals feel far away now, that doesn’t mean they were a waste. It may simply mean they need to be revisited, reshaped, or replanted in a way that fits who you are now.

Think of your goals like seeds.

Some take root quickly. Others need more time, more care, or a different environment to grow.

You might ask yourself:

• What still matters to me?

• What feels misaligned now?

• What needs more support?

• What small shift could I make this month?

Big change doesn’t always come from a dramatic set of actions. Sometimes it begins with one honest adjustment, one clearer intention, or one small step taken consistently.

Let the rest of the year grow from here

Reflection helps us move forward with a little more clarity and a little more compassion.

When we take time to notice what’s been true, we’re better able to choose what comes next with intention. We stop forcing ourselves into old expectations and start responding to the season we’re actually in.

So take a few minutes today. Grab your notebook, open the notes app on your phone, and write your own “Actually” List.

You may find that your year is already holding more growth, resilience, and movement than you realized!